Somethin' Weird to be Excited about....

The Gastrograffin enema x-ray for Nethan is set for Wednesday morning at 8 a.m. I know it is kind of wierd but I am actually looking forward and excited for it. Well of course now I write that I realize what I am really excited about and looking forward to is knowing more of what is going on with his little ol' colon that doesn't produce poop. Yes that is what I am excited about. This wondering what is going on and what is NOT going on with him is driving me crazy. I don't think I or anyone else can even begin to imagine what it must be like to be so little and not understand what is going on and why there is so much pain... I can't even think very much about what the actual test will be like for him or I get too upset. I think I should practice imagining him being restrained and crying so it won't be so hard but even practicing upsets me. I definitely am going to take 1/2 a Xanax. Ya' know the ones I have for ICE....(In Case of Earthquake).... Just keep remembering this has to be done... this has to be done.... this has to be done.... This will give information we need to help him... God help me and help him through this...